🎮💸🤖 BREAKING: Ubisoft's Assassin’s Creed and Aliens are about to invade your Xbox! 🎉💥 🚀💣 Caution: Gamer wallets about to explode like that one meme of the cat launching himself into a wall! 😂💀 Full alert for subscribers of Xbox Game Pass, 'cause on August 7th, we’re diving headfirst into *Assassin's Creed: Mirage*! 🥷✨ 155 million copies sold? More like 155 million reasons to stop searching for that rare indie gem when corporate overlords keep shoving their franchises down our throats! 😤💩 In a recent (*totally not fake*) convo with a Ubisoft dev: 👨‍💻 “Bro, what do we do with all this money?” 👾 “Just throw more Assassins into the mix, they’ll eat it up!” 💰 *Drake Pointing Meme intensifies* But wait, there’s more! Aliens are reportedly touching down to steal your time too! Imagine spending all night trying to kill the same alien 37 times while your sleep schedule goes “This is fine! 🚫😴” 🔥💀 Here's a hot take: By 2025, Game Pass will roll out an NFT system for every game you play, and gamers will need to auction their souls for extra life bonuses! 🚪👻 Go ahead, seethe! So gear up, fam. It’s gonna be a wild ride! #GamerLife #Stonks #NotAPyramidScheme