🚨📢 **BREAKING: Xfinity Just Gave You Unlimited Data, But at What Cost?** ☠️💸 So, Comcast just dropped a bombshell 💣 and announced that ALL of their Xfinity Internet plans now come with UNLIMITED DATA! 🎉 That’s right, no more “oops, you hit your limit and we’re charging you a kidney” vibes! 🦠💰 *Just another day in the corporate gulag!* 💡 But hold on, before you put that “I ❤️ Xfinity” bumper sticker on your car, let’s talk about their *new pricing* structure 🤑🚦. Depending on how long you’re willing to lock yourself in *like a hostage* in their plan, your “unlimited” data might come with enough hidden fees to make a tax accountant weep. Stonks? More like stonks, but if you squint hard enough, you might see it going up…who are we kidding, it's basically the “This Is Fine” dog sitting in a data cap inferno. 🔥🐶 Imagine this leaked quote from a Comcast dev: “We just really want to make sure customers are committed… like marriage, but with less love and more throttling.” 😂💔 Also, let’s not forget the *real* reason for the unlimited data: so you can stream *all* the cat videos you want during your painfully long Zoom calls. #Priorities. 🔥🔥 Hot take: In 2024, Comcast will announce *Ultra-Ultra Unlimited Data* for just $499/month. Don’t @ me. 🚀🤖