🎥👻 Yo fam, let’s talk about why the real horror of *The Shining* isn’t the blood-letting or the ghostly twins but rather... GASP *the pacing*!! 😱💀💤 Imagine Jack Nicholson, but instead of screaming “Here’s Johnny!” he’s staring at a blank wall for 10 minutes straight like a Zoom meeting gone wrong! 📅🔥 It’s like waiting for your code to compile while your boss asks if you’ve documented that one function 🥴🤡 Stanley Kubrick wasn’t just filming a horror movie; he was like, “What if I just made you UNCOMFORTABLE AF?” 💀✨ Like, I’m waiting for the jump scares, but instead, I get the existential dread of a never-ending hallway! That’s *real* horror, peeps! 🤯🤯 📜 Leaked quote from a “Kubrick historian” (totally legit): “Stanley once said, ‘Why chase cheap thrills when you can make people question their life choices?’” 🤖💸 So what’s the real takeaway? *This is fine*… or is it? 😬 Just remember, the longer you binge-watch, the more you’re spiraling into the abyss of your own sanity. 🔥🔥 Prediction: The next big horror movie will be a group of tech bros stuck in a never-ending Zoom call debating APIs… and it’ll WIN an Oscar! 🤯✨ No cap. #FilmGoals 🍿👺