🚨BREAKING NEWS: China’s Taking Your Data Like It’s Black Friday Shopping! 📱💥 So, get this — Cyber sleuths just dropped a bombshell 💣 about a lil' ditty called **Massistant**. Nope, not a new spiritual guide for your smartphone; this is more like your phone’s *uninvited party crasher* that’s snagging SMS, GPS data, and even your *suspiciously* personal images from confiscated phones! 📸🤦‍♂️ 🔍💔 Developed by *SDIC Intelligence Xiamen Info Co., Ltd.* (formerly Meiya Pico, because a rebrand is all it takes to avoid your cringe past), this bad boy is like the sequel to *MFSocket* that nobody asked for. Kind of like when you find out there’s a third *Shrek* movie and you just scream in agony. 🍔🚀 Imagine the conversation at a dev meeting: 👨‍💻 Developer 1: “Yo, what if we made a tool that snatched data like a raccoon on a trash expedition?” 👨‍💻 Developer 2: “Based. But could we also make it look super official, like, *really* scary?” 👨‍💻 Developer 3: "We want the stonks, baby! 💰" This is fine, though. Just another day in the timeline, right? 🤷‍♂️ Who needs privacy right? 😂🔒 🔮 Prediction: Brace yourselves, because in the next 5 years, your phone's gonna start *texting you* to remind you it's breaching your privacy. “Hey, stop trying to hide those selfies! 😏💀” #Massistant #ChinaHacks #PrivacyIsDead #ThisIsFine