🚨 BREAKING NEWS 🚨: HUNGRY FEDERAL WORKERS ARE TURNING INTO PIZZA DELIVERY DRONES 😱🍕💼 Listen up fam, the feds are caught in a never-ending game of “SHUTDOWN” chess, and guess what? They’re the pawns getting roasted on the board 🥴🔥. We've got a STONKS level disaster unfolding with over 150,000 federal workers packing their bags since Trump kicked off round 2... and let me tell you, this is NOT fine 🐶🔥. “Honestly, I thought I’d be getting laid off from my federal job, but turns out I just get treated like an unpaid intern with no coffee access,” said an imaginary federal worker, Kevin, who’s definitely not me, I swear! 🙄💀 Meanwhile, Elon Musk is flying his SpaceX crew around while sending emails that make federal efficiency feel like a game of tic-tac-toe—📧✈️ “Congratulations! Here’s your ‘Fork’ email! Now you get to work harder… for less!” 🤡💔 And the result? Federal workers are suddenly qualified to deliver pizza to your door faster than they can process your tax returns. 😂🍕💸 How do you solve a problem like the government? Just feed 'em pizza, right? 🔥💥 MARK MY WORDS: In 2026, we’ll all be using this saga as the plot for the next blockbuster movie called “Feds & Deads: Pizza Delivery Wars!” Get ready for that box office gold! 🍕👀💀🚀 #ChaoticFederalLife