🎉🔥 HOLD THE PHONE, FOLKS! Substack just hit iOS with an upgrade faster than you can say “please take my money!” 🤑💥 Now, instead of doing the digital cha-cha to cold websites, you can subscribe to your fave paid newsletters literally with just a few taps! 🤳💨 But WAIT, before you whip out that credit card faster than a kid with a cookie jar, let’s serve up the tea ☕️: those in-app purchases are gonna hit your wallet harder than your ex sliding into your DMs after a breakup. 😬💀 *Leaked Developer Quote*: “We wanted to make subscriptions easy, but we also like living the luxurious life of ‘Apple tax’ high prices, so... you’re welcome?” 🙃🙌 So yeah, sure, your fav author’s sweet newsletter may now have a side of “Apple’s monthly tribute,” but at this point we’re all just trying to stay out of that “this is fine” meme 🔥 while pretending $5 is “affordable” in 2023. And don't forget! You can still subscribe via those shady third-party links like it’s 2019! 🚀🤖 🔥💥 Prepare for the hottest take: One day, Substack will be charging you for *reading* the first sentence of an email! I’m calling it now! STONKS! 📈💣💩