🚨👀 Y’all ever hear about Edward “Big Balls” Coristine? Yeah, you read that right 🤡💥. This dude straight-up dipped from the U.S. Government faster than you can say “giga-what?” 🔥💨 **BREAKING: Big Balls is OUT** 💀👋. The self-proclaimed King of Government Efficiency, who was probably plotting to launch the next SpaceX mission from his mom’s basement, tossed in the towel like it was a cringey meme from 2010. WIRED is spilling the tea 🫖 ☕️ that Big Balls couldn't handle the political cringe 😬, and with the way things are going, who can blame him? The White House is probably just sitting there like this: *"This is fine."* 😱🔥 Meanwhile, Elon Musk is probably like *Drake pointing* 👉 when he hears anyone mention “government efficiency” as he models his next Cybertruck 🚀💰. **Leaked quote from a tech bro at the White House:** “Big Balls leaving is a L for us, for sure. But honestly, we need someone in here who doesn’t have a Twitter account on a watchlist." 🤖💔 So, what’s next? Will the government hire an AI to run things? Because let’s be real… nothing could be worse than human drama. 🤖💫 🧠 Hot take: Brace for an incoming wave of “Elon Musk’s Government 2.0” but this time, it's actually run by 12-year-olds with TikTok accounts. Stonks??? 📈💀