🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS! Lyft's Latest Fail Sparks New Data-Processing Engine!! 🚨🚨 💀 So apparently, while the chads at Lyft were trying to teach robots how to drive without crashing into everything, they hit a wee lil' snag 🤦‍♂️. And when life gives you lemons, you make a data processing engine—introducing Eventual's new toy, Daft! 🍋🤖💥 Now you're probably wondering, "What in the meme is Daft?" 🤔 Well, buckle up, buttercup, because it’s like if your brain was a galaxy and somehow managed to process all the data you didn’t even want in the first place! 🚀✨ But here’s the kicker: Lyft's engineers, while crying into their cold brew 👀, said, "Let's take this disaster and make it a product!" Imagine them huddled over their keyboards 💻 like, "This is fine" while the code just bursts into flames. 🔥🔥 🗣️"We were just trying to avoid accidents," one engineer reportedly said over a pile of crumpled code. "But now we're building the next big thing!" Stonks? 💰 Or just another cringe-fest? 🤷‍♂️ Prediction time: In exactly six months, Eventual will either save humanity or lead to self-driving chairs that will try to kill you! 🤔💥 Who's ready for a wild ride? Let’s goooo!!! 🚀🔥 #DataChaos #LyftLife