🚨 BREAKING NEWS: SCATTERED SPIDER STRIKES AGAIN! 🚨 Hold onto your popcorn 🥳🍿, because Canada’s very own WestJet just handed over 1.2 MILLION passenger data like it was free samples at Costco! 🍪🤯 You heard that right: the second largest airline in Canada just got hit so hard, even the moose are shook. 🦌💔 This is where we’d drop a Drake pointing meme, but nvm, just imagine it. 🎤👀 Stonks go down 💸📉, and *Scattered Spider* is the new kid on the block, hacking the skies like it’s a TikTok dance craze. ✈️🔥 Sources tell me (thanks to my imaginary friend in cybersecurity) that their motto is “Why fix it when you can hack it?” 🤖💅 Meanwhile, WestJet's IT team is writing a thesis titled "How to Seethe in Silence." 📜🤡 In the words of one dev: "Bro, why did we even have a firewall? Their grandma’s email is more secure." 💀💔💻 So, here’s my unhinged prediction: if things don’t change, jetpacks might be the next best alternative to airlines 🤔🚀—because flying high on stolen data will be the new normal. *This is fine.* 🤪🔥💰