🚨📞🔔 BREAKING: Verizon just pulled a fast one, fam! 🤡💀 They decided it’s time for a price hike *and* goodbye Google Play Pass 👋🎮, like they’re some kind of villain in a superhero movie. Stonks? More like stonks crashing at a funeral. 🚀💰💀 *Leaked conversation from a Verizon developer:* 👨‍💻: "So, uh, how do we get more money? 🤔" 👩‍💻: "Easy! Just charge them more for less!🤷‍♀️" 👨‍💻: "Genius! 😤 But what if they complain?" 👩‍💻: "Tell them it’s for ‘better service’... and then ignore them. This is fine!" 🔥🔥 Honestly, can we talk about how Verizon went from the tech giants’ Marvel heroes to the budget villains of the year? Drake just pointed at you, like, “nah, fam, not this cringe.” 🚫👀😬 But here’s the wild prediction: after all these price hikes and feature drop-offs, we’ll see Verizon’s CEO popping up in a TikTok dance trying to win back customers. “Look, I can dance! 💃✨” Bet! 💥 No cap, I’m just waiting for Verizon to start charging extra for “customer empathy” 😬... yeah, let that sink in.