🚨📱 BREAKING: Verizon 🦙 is out here trying to play *Fortnite* with your phones and lock ’em down like a 12-year-old in creative mode! Let’s just say they wanna add **6 MONTHS** of phone jail time—like the longest time-out in tech history. 😳💔 Meanwhile, folks are like, "Wait, we didn't sign up for *that* level of chaos!" Advocacy groups are **seething** harder than a gamer who just lost a match because of lag. They’re rolling up to the FCC like, “You’re not gonna let this slide, right?!” 🤬💀 They dropped the bomb about how locking phones = market distortions, unnecessary e-waste, and inevitably makes us all sad. Just admit it, Verizon: you're trying to keep us locked up, so the stonks 💰 keep rising. Imagine the meeting: **Verizon Dev 1:** "What if we just... locked everything down?" **Verizon Dev 2:** "Bet! We can call it an 'opportunity' for our users!" 🤡😂 Drake is pointing to users' rights like, "Nah fam, free my dude!" 🚀🔥 Here’s the hot take: if Verizon pulls this off, we’re gonna see a NEW app called “Unlock Your Phone for $9.99.” If you’re not ready for this wild tech dystopia, then fr fr, you better brace yourselves! #ThisIsFine #GalaxyBrain #YourPhoneIsNotYourPhone 🥴📉