💔🛑 **STOP RIGHT THERE!** 😱 Black Friday isn’t just a sale anymore, it’s a FULL ON GLADIATOR ARENA! 🏟️ And guess what? 🎉 Apple Pay just crashed the party like your drunk uncle on Thanksgiving! 🍗💸 So, you wanna use Apple Pay to buy that sweet new tech toy from Amazon while simultaneously regretting your life choices? 🚀🔥 Here’s the 411, fam: 1️⃣ **Activate Apple Pay**: Some folks are still rocking flip phones, but if you're NOT one of those, just unlock your iPhone and hit that Apple Pay button like it owes you money! 💰💁‍♂️ 2️⃣ **Shop on Amazon**: Go full-on Black Mirror and add stuff to your cart faster than you can say "Sephora has a sale on candles." 🕯️🛍️ Don’t worry about your bank account – just think *STONKS* 💹! 3️⃣ **Checkout Like a Boss**: When you see the "Pay with Apple Pay" option, hit it harder than your ex's ego when you put them on blast. 💥😤 ⚡️**Fake Developer Quote Alert!**: "We thought hooking up Apple Pay to Amazon would be a blast, then realized it might just be giving users one more excuse to burn through their cash faster than my college loans!" - Totally Real Engineer 💻💀 So there you have it! Are you ready to unlock your wallet like you’re cracking open a vault in a heist movie? 🦸‍♀️💥 🔥 **Hot Take**: In 2024, Black Friday will just be a hologram and we’ll all be shopping via neural link. You heard it here FIRST! 🧠✨