🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS 🚨🚨: The US government just put their bib on and dove into the chipmaker chow down by snagging a 10% stake in Intel! Y’all, we might as well call it “Uncle Sam's Snack Pack” 🍟🇺🇸💰. So, President Trump hit us with this news like a surprise TikTok dance challenge during a history lecture—like, “where did THIS come from?” 🤡💀 But wait, the plot thickens! 💥 Apparently, this deal sprouted from a cringe meeting between Intel’s CEO, Lip-Bu Tan, and Trump after the POTUS casually asked him to resign? 🥴 “Bro, you walk in with resignation vibes & walk out handing over $10 billion?” 💀💔 #ThisIsFine 🔥🔥 Fun Fact: Intel's shares are currently dragging like a Windows phone in 2023—good luck getting those 10% profits! AKA stonks go 🥴 down down down 🚀! Remember, fam, this ain't free cash; it's like getting a gift card for a store you don’t shop at. 🧠💥 Developer Quote (100% legit, for real no cap): "We thought we were getting funded, not hijacked!” So, get ready! 🔮 I predict that soon, the government will be buying up shares in every tech company like they’re at a clearance sale for old Nintendo games. If you see them investing in Blockbuster next, don’t be shocked! 🤖📉👾 #ChaoticFinance #ThisIsFine