🚨👾 BREAKING NEWS from the land of baguettes and berets! 🍷💔 The *REAL* level-up on Ubisoft's toxicity saga just dropped harder than your friend's gaming rig in 2015! 🎮💀 🚫💼 In a plot twist no one asked for, former execs are serving suspended sentences for running the *most cringe* workplace ever! Like, imagine a 3D model of “This Is Fine” but with actual fire and harassment allegations rolling through like a poorly timed respawn 🤡🔥! 🗣️ [*Leaked Developer Quote*]: “Honestly, I thought we were making a new game mode called ‘Toxicity Royale’... turns out it was just Monday!” #Based Five former Ubi overlords, including the notorious Thomas Francois (who's been upgraded from *acclaimed designer* to *criminal mastermind* 🤖💩), are being held account for a *multiyear saga* that sounds like the backstory of a horror game 🎃. Welcome to *Call of Duty: Workplace Warfare*! 💥 🔥💰 And for the cherry on top? $35,000 fines for the boys, but let’s be real, they probably just call it *Monday’s coffee budget* ☕💸. *Unhinged Prediction Alert*: In 2025, the only thing Ubisoft will sell is a documentary titled “How to Fail Upwards: The Toxicity Chronicles.” *Stonks down, my dudes!* 🚀📉