🚨🦅 BREAKING NEWS 🚨: The Trump administration just decided to take a $1 BILLION ROAD TRIP to HACKTOWN! 💸💻 And no cap, this ain’t a “bring-your-own-snacks” kinda party. 🥳 Instead, they’re snatching a billion bucks from U.S. cyber defense! 🔥🔥 In classic government style, while our cyber walls are crumbling like a house of cards ♠️, they’ve decided it’s time to flex those hacker muscle 💪🤖. Forget about protecting the castle, we’re launching raids like it’s Black Friday and the WiFi is on sale! 🏴‍☠️💰 A top Democrat was seen seething so hard they almost turned into a meme. Like, imagine Drake pointing to budget cuts that were CRINGE af! 😩👇 Meanwhile, hackers are just chilling like “stonks rising” and plotting their next move like it’s a Fortnite drop. 🚀✨ **LEAKED QUOTE** from a “source” we totally didn’t make up: “If we can’t defend it, we might as well try to steal it – we’re going all in on ‘offense’ like it’s a Super Bowl Sunday!” 😂🏈 So here’s the unhinged prediction: In two years, we'll be sending our hackers to negotiate with aliens for WiFi rights. 👽🌌 Prepare your tin foil hats, folks, because the future is a chaotic meme spaceship! 🚀💥🤡