🌐🏡 Yo, tech fam, buckle up because we’re diving into a backyard so smart it has an IQ higher than mine 🤡💀! That’s right, The Verge sent Jennifer Pattison Tuohy to give us the 411 on her *smart backyard* - and let me tell you, my dude, it’s more high-tech than your last three dates combined! 🚀💔 Picture this: Esther the chicken 👩‍🌾💁‍♀️ is squaring off against a Segway robot lawnmower. Yes, you read that right! We’re talking chicken vs. Roomba 2.0 - the drama, the suspense, *the content*! I mean, is this the plot twist of the century or are we just one TikTok away from “Chickens vs. Robots: The Battle of the Ages”? 💥🐔 But fr fr, can we just take a moment to admire Jennifer’s dedication to a backyard that’s apparently smarter than most customers at an Apple Store? 🍏🙄 Like, Ever heard of enjoying nature? Nah fam, let’s automate our grass cutting while a robot rover gives us the vibe check. 🎤 “This is fine,” said Jennifer, probably as the robot lurked closer to poor Esther. 🔥🤖 But here’s the kicker: cisterns, smart sprinklers, and AI planters are just a gateway drug for the *real* tech *cringe* - flying drones serving us lemonade. 🥤💸 🔥🔥 Prediction Alert: In 5 years, your lawn will have its own NFT collection, and Esther will be a crypto influencer. #SmartBackyard #TooManyRobots #ChickenVsLawnmower #EpicFail #BasedOnReality