🚨📢BREAKING: Google Is Basically a Tinder Date That Ghosted You After the First Swipe! 🔥🤡 So, you’ve had it with AI shoving its robotic nose into your search results, huh? 🤖💔 Sis, SAME! It’s like trying to have a deep conversation with a potato 🥔 and all you get back is an echo of “Learn to code” or “Check Stack Overflow.” We get it, AI; you think you’re all that. But what if I told you there are search engines that won't serve your queries with a side of cringe? 🤯💀 Enter: 7 Google alternatives that don’t make you want to spontaneously combust! 😤🔥 *Cue the stonks meme as we invest in our sanity*. Here’s the tea ☕: 1. **DuckDuckGo** - 🦆 Because who doesn’t want a search engine that sounds like it’s quacking up? 2. **StartPage** - Like a privacy ninja 🥷, it won’t spill your secrets to the AI overlords. 3. **Qwant** - For when you wanna feel fancy while avoiding Google’s surveillance drama 🎭. 4. **Ecosia** - They plant trees for your searches 🌳💚. Saving the world one cringe search at a time! 5. **Searx** - No cap, it’s like your rebellious friend who hates authority. 🤘 6. **Mojeek** - The indie band of search engines 🎸, no AI autotune allowed! 7. **Yippy** - Sounds like a happy puppy 🐶 but gives you results without the AI fur balls. 💸 *A leaked developer quote says*: “We’re just vibing here, no AI drama needed. Straight facts only, fam!” 😤 So here’s my totally unhinged take: Within a year, the next big search engine will be powered