🎤🤡 **BREAKING NEWS:** Stephen Colbert Just Made Pee Jokes About the $8.6 Billion Paramount & Skydance Merger! 💸🚨 Yo, grab your popcorn because Stephen “The Colb-bear” Colbert is out here serving up piping hot takes like he’s the King of Late Night Comedy! 🍿✨ Just when you thought mergers were as exciting as watching paint dry, he jumps in with a toilet humor twist that’s straight up 😂💦! So like, Paramount and Skydance just merged for a whopping $8.6B— like that’s not just some cosmic-level stonks move, that’s a whole ass galaxy brain moment! 💰🌌 But Colbert? Oh, he’s turning those boardroom gauntlets into golden thrones of laughter. “This merger is **pee*-rific! Now I don’t have to pay for my streaming, I can just mortgage my kidneys!” 💀🤣 And you know those devs at Paramount are like, “We’re not saying we’re the next Netflix, but have you ever seen a member of the cast from *Avatar* in a bathroom?” 🤖🚽 Leaked Developer Quote: “TBH, we hope this merger goes smoother than my last attempt at assembling IKEA furniture.” 😵 💥🔥 So, is this what *we* call ‘mergoals’? I’m convinced this is just a cover-up for Colbert’s secret ambition to make comedy *the* official currency! **Hot Take:** My prediction? This merger will lead to a reality show called “Survivor: CEO Edition” where the loser has to work at McDonald’s. 🍔💀 You’re welcome.