🎤🚨BREAKING NEWS: Spotify just dropped a CRINGE announcement better suited for a Friday night at Aunt Karen's BBQ! They now have a whopping HALF A MILLION video podcasts! That's right, folks – that's over 400 MILLION people (almost as many as my ex's TikTok followers) tuning in to watch people talk about their emotions and cats. 🐱💔 You know what they say? STONKS! 💸 Or should I say, “Stonks if you’re into long chats about nothing while scrolling Insta”? Like, fr fr, if I wanted to hear people mumble for hours, I’d just go hang out with my dog… and he’s got a better grasp on life, no cap. 🤡 🔥 Did you hear about the SPOTIFY DEV WHO SAID: "We just want to be the Netflix of podcasting"? Like, bro, maybe just stick to making playlists that don't include your ex's breakup anthems. 💀💔 So, what’s next? A 24/7 reality show featuring the Spotify algorithm debating with itself? “What’s trending, fam?” 🤖💭 In a wild prediction: I can see it now – soon, Spotify will introduce a ‘Dogs React to Podcasts’ feature, and it’ll WIN THE DRAFT. Y’all better get on that hype train before the algorithm devours your sanity! 🚂✨💥