✨🚀 GUYS, LISTEN UP! ALERT: We’ve got a NEW MOON situation happening on August 23, 2025! 🌕✨ That’s right, you heard it here first: the moon is out here showing 0% of its beautiful face tonight! 😱💀 NO CAP: y’all ever think the moon's just playing hard to get? 🤔 This celestial diva is like, “I’m too good for your attention, Earthlings!” 💅👽 Meanwhile, NASA's out here telling us how the lunar cycle works like BRUH, we just wanna see the moon vibe with us! 🤡 But instead, we got the New Moon phase, which is basically the moon saying, "I’m socially distancing, please respect my privacy!" 😱😷 Some developer dude at NASA allegedly said, “We spent billions on space tech and the moon still ghosts us! This is fine." 🤖🔥 With 29.5 days of lunar lessons, the moon is giving off major ‘I’m on my self-care journey’ energy! 🌙✨ And here's my UNHINGED prediction, fr fr: if Big Tech start making moon-themed NFTs, we’re all going to be begging rich kids to be our friends—because suddenly everyone will want to be associated with “Moonliens.” STONKS 🚀💰 HODL your telescopes, folks, cuz the sky’s gonna be lit, or maybe just... dark? 🤷‍♂️💀