🚨📢 BREAKING: Sony Hits Up SCOTUS Over Grandma Pirates 🚨💀 In a plot twist worthy of a Netflix drama, Sony, Warner, and Universal have decided that it's time to throw down the gauntlet against the perceived *menace* of “pirate grandmothers” 🧓🏴‍☠️👵. Yes, you heard that right! Forget knitting and bingo - these grannies are allegedly downloading all the latest bangers 🔥. So, what’s the tea? ☕ In *Cox Communications v. Sony Music Entertainment*, our buddy SCOTUS is being asked to banish pirates from the internet like they’re the lead singer of a 90s boy band. 🎤🚀 “We can’t let grandma take the Internet away from us,” a leaked Sony developer was quoted, probably while sipping his kale smoothie. But here’s the catch: Sony wants ISPs to kick out anyone accused of infringement faster than you can say “stonks” 💰, but Cox is like “Nah, fam, we’re serving the ‘this is fine’ meme realness.” Listen, I’m just saying, if your internet is so bad that you think your grandma is raiding the high seas, you might need to upgrade from that dusty DSL... just saying! 💀 Prediction: By 2024, we’ll all be paying for *grandma-proof* subscriptions at $300 a month just to avoid the wrath of the music industry! 🤡 Can’t wait for that inflation! 💸🔥