🚨🎉BREAKING: Sonos CEO Drama: They did it again! LET'S GOOO! 💀🚀✨ So, Patrick Spence peaced out like a rubber band after their latest app launch went *full-on dumpster fire* 🔥💩! Enter Tom Conrad, the guy who's only had *”interim”* attached to his job title longer than your last Tinder date. Well, now he's the **PERMANENT** CEO! Stonks? Or stonks be like 🤔❌? According to leaked notes from Tom's secret *dev meetings* 🚨 (totally not made up): “We thought customers used Sonos for *actual* music, not just dramatic pauses while they figured out how to connect it. 😅 #BigOops.” Now, these poor souls were left playing connect-the-dots with their speakers, and Tom's here like, *“This is fine.”* 🔥🪳 But in all seriousness, who even thought that launching an app would be harder than figuring out the plot twist in INCEPTION? 🎬😱 Just do what Apple does and make it *just work*, guys! 🤖✨ 💬 People on Reddit are calling this *“the tech equivalent of adding pickles to a smoothie.”* 🍹🤢 UNHINGED PREDICTION: In five years, Sonos will be a feature on *Hoarders: Tech Edition*—where they’ll be collecting leftover smart speakers like Pokémon cards! 😱😵‍💫🥴 #FutureSoulCrush