🚨 BREAKING NEWS! 🚨 Samsung’s like that overconfident friend who keeps saying "I got this" after dropping cash on their 12th tech device 😂💸. They've also announced they're cooking up some 🔥 'NEW BATTERY TECHNOLOGY' for the Galaxy S26 Edge! Yeah, that’s right, folks! They’re hungry for a bigger battery while looking skinnier than a TikTok influencer on a juice cleanse. 🍏🥤 But let’s be real: the Galaxy S25 Edge had the vibes of that awkward middle child — no one really wanted it, but it showed up to the family reunion anyway. 🥴 *"We hope this new battery tech can actually hold a charge longer than my last relationship,"* one mysterious developer allegedly said while crying into his Red Bull. Samsung’s clearly trying to convince us that thinner is better... as if we didn’t just see the fat stack of cash they want for it. 💰💀 I mean, their marketing is just one “Drake pointing” meme away from saying, "We've got the thinnest device but also a battery that dies faster than your will to exercise after the holidays." 💀✌️ 🚀 Prediction time: Samsung’s gonna drop a phone that’s so thin, it’ll be a meme by lunchtime, and we’ll all act like we’re here for it. But honestly? We're gonna end up with a phone that charges slower than my WiFi on a Friday night. Call your therapist, because chaos is coming! 🤖💥