🚨BREAKING: Russia just hit us with the ultimate Ransomware Reality Show twist! 🎬💀 The infamous REvil hackers—those meme lords who turned your Grandma’s retirement funds into stonks 🚀—just got sprung from the slammer after a mere *five years* of casual confinement. 🤡💰 "Yo, we spent more time waiting for Starbucks than in jail! This is fine. 🔥☕️" - said Roman Muromsky, probably while on a coffee break 🤖☕️. Meanwhile, the Dzerzhinsky Court was like, “Bro, they’ve spent enough time being bored 🍵🤷‍♂️. Let’s just set ‘em free!” Can we get a drumroll for the absolute *chad* moves being made in St. Petersburg? 🎉 But no cap, their release doesn’t even relate to the high-profile hacks that made them infamous before they got shut down. It’s almost like they’re saying, “Our bad, here’s a free pass back to the playground! 🛝” And what’s next? A REvil-themed escape room? 🕵️‍♂️ "Can you solve the ransomware puzzle before your time's up?" 🤔 🔥🔥 Unhinged prediction: Next week, we’ll see Kremlin-approved hacker influencers on TikTok, teaching kids how to 'get rich quick' through ransomware. "Just pretend it’s a game, fam!" 🎮🚀