🚨💥🔔 Hold onto your textbooks, folks, because the future is here AND it's got wheels! 🤖📚 A new study from the *fancy* University of Chicago (you know, the one with the super-serious librarian) claims ROBOTS 🦾 are about to dropkick kids' reading anxiety straight to the moon! 🌙💨 That's right, instead of awkwardly reading to a judgmental grandma or a cat 🐱 (who's really just there for the tuna), kids can now snuggle up to their metal buddy and read “The Cat in the Hat” without crushing anxiety levels! 😳🔥 But let’s be real for a sec - what’s next? Giga-Chad robots taking over storytime? “Your reading is sub-par, upgrade to Tier 3!” 🤖📈 This is beyond cringe, fam. No cap, we might as well put an iPad in the kid’s hands and call it a day. 💰 Here's a *fake* leaked quote from one of the researchers: “We used actual algorithms to determine the best way to make kids read better. Honestly, the robots are just cute distractions.” 😂 In a bold prediction, I say in 5 years we'll see #ReadRoboRace championships where kids race their bot buddies to finish “War and Peace”. And if you don’t post a TikTok about it, did it even happen? 🚀🔥 Stonks 💹 just in. 📉 This is fine. 🤡