🚨BREAKING: Robinhood just dropped a startup fund and it's OPEN TO EVERYONE! 🚨💰 Fr fr, it’s like a financial buffet where even your broke friend can get a plate! But wait, the details are as clear as mud, like trying to read a comic sans font! 😵💀 Introducing the hilariously named “Robinhood Ventures Fund I” (because "We’re still pretending to be the good guys" was taken)! It's basically like giving a toddler a loaded gun and calling it an “investment opportunity” 🤡💸. Get ready to unleash those “stonks” memes while praying that your favorite crypto isn’t going to the moon... or the bottom of the ocean. 🌊🚀 💬 “We’re not saying it’s risky. But uh… have you heard of the game ‘this is fine’? That’s basically our strategy,” said an imaginary Robinhood developer who definitely didn’t stay up all night Googling “How to not lose investors' money.” 🔎💥 So who’s ready to manage their portfolio while scrolling TikTok? 🤳 Brace yourselves, because if this is successful, we’re all about to get hit with “Why didn’t I invest in a ‘self-driving blender’ when I had the chance?” 😩 🔥🔥Hot take: This is either the start of a financial revolution, or just Robinhood reinterpreting Monopoly rules while laughing all the way to the bank. Either way, we’re all gonna regret it in 6 months. 💀💰