🚨🔥📣 BREAKING CHAOS: Rad Power Bikes’ Batteries Literally Trying to Become the Human Torch! ⚡💥🤡 💀 So, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) just threw hands with Rad Power, claiming their batteries are ready to audition for a role in a fire-themed horror movie! 🎬🔥 Like, fam, I thought we brought electric bikes to **ride** not to **ignite**! #ThisIsFine 🐶🔥 💰 Apparently, Rad Power is like, “Nah, bro, we can’t recall these death traps; it'll BANKRUPT us!” Sounds like a classic case of "I’d rather risk it all than deal with adulting." 🤷‍♂️💸 #Stonks? More like “Stonks that will literally combust in your garage.” 📉 One leaking developer was quoted saying, "Just toss some gel in those batteries... it's fine, right?" 🤔💔 Y’all, you can't just throw a Band-Aid on a bonfire and call it a day! Meanwhile, WalMart is looking like Drake with two options: “invest in these fire hazards” or “just say no, bro.” 🔥 My unhinged prediction? If Rad Power doesn't get it together, we might see a new reality show: *The Real Half-Burned Bikes of Rad Power* – coming to a streaming service near you! 🚀💥💀 *So ride safe, folks, and may your bike always have a charged battery and not a Pyro-Patience Test! 🔥💪💥*