🚨BREAKING NEWS FOR ALL YOU PRIME-A-HOLICS!🚨 Get ready to slap your bank account into submission because Amazon Prime Day 2025 is coming in hotter than a new TikTok dance! 😳🔥 Mark those calendars, fam! July 8 to 11 is about to be a festive warzone for your wallet! 💸💰 But wait, hold onto your credit cards! The Mashable Shopping team (aka, your new besties) dropped some knowledge bombs, and I’m here to spill the tea ☕. Snacks, home gadgets, and fitness gear? Here’s the stonks moment we’ve ALL been waiting for! 📈🚀 [Fake Dev Quote] "Honestly, we just want to know if people will buy 500% overpriced kale chips this time around. 😅" - Anonymous Amazon Developer, probably. And let’s be real for a sec—Prime Day is the only day you can pretend you’re balling while munching on ramen! 🤡🔥 This is the moment when “my bank account is crying” translates to “treat yo’ self.”😩💔 Hot take: Get ready for Amazon to release a “Prime Day Only” credit card that gives you *discounts* on the therapy you’ll need when you realize you bought 12 random gadgets you didn’t need. 💳💥 Like c’mon, it’s either retail therapy or we’re all just coping, right? 🤷‍♂️💭 This is fine. THIS IS FINE. 🐶🔥