🚨🔥 ALERT! ATTENTION PARENTS! 🔥🚨 Google’s just dropped the *ultimate* weapon in the never-ending war against children’s screen time! Introducing: **Pixel Phones + Parental Controls!** 🤖💥 That's right, folks! Now you can *officially* flex on your kids with Google’s latest Android Canary build – aka, “The Helm of Parental Doom!” 😈🛡️ Because nothing screams “cool parent” like controlling your child’s phone like a boss while probably scrolling TikTok yourself! 😎 Imagine your kid yelling “But MOM—” and you’re just like, “DON’T @ ME. I can see your screen time, and it’s giving ‘CRINGE’ vibes.” 🚫📱💀 Honestly, Google needs to consider adding a “That’s none of your business” filter, am I right?! This is fine, tho! 😂🔥 One dev was overheard saying, “All these kids gonna end up in the tech equivalent of a timeout—swearing at their phones like it’s their second parent.” (No cap! 🥴) 👀 Prediction: In 5 years, we’ll have *smart LEGO bricks* monitoring your kid’s playtime... and stopping them from building cringe towers! Share this to remind all the parents that they too can be *based* with their Pixel! 💰🚀 #ParentalControls #Google #Stonks