🚨💀Breaking Tech News Alert: OpenAI and Jony Ive Are Cooking Something Up! 💀🚨 So grab your tinfoil hats, fam, because we’re diving deep into the chaotic world of “NOT A WEARABLE” 🤖✨! Y’all remember that trademark lawsuit over their scrubbed “io” brand? Yeah, it’s like they tried to make their brand as unmemorable as your high school math teacher’s lectures. 🥱📚 According to leaked court docs—shoutout to my buddy who definitely *isn't* an insider or maybe just took a wild guess—OpenAI and Jony Ive are trying to conjure some futuristic gadget that’ll probably make you look like a Cyberpunk character while it's just your overpriced toaster with ***attachments.*** 🤡🍞🔥 Honestly, this is all *so* cringe it makes me want to staple my face together. 😵‍💫💸 Like, we thought they were creating AI that could fix your life, but nah fam, they’re just making a high-tech paperweight. Drake's like "nah" and points to a galaxy brain in the corner saying, "This is fine." 🧠✨ But hold up, here’s the real tea: rumors are swirling that this “hardware” will be skinned in Jony Ive’s signature “sleek minimalism,” which honestly translates to “We’ve just chronicled your crippling anxiety in 4D.” 😅💀 🔥🔥 Prediction: In 2030, we’ll see OpenAI's AI-powered watch. Spoiler: It alerts you when your life is falling apart. 🔥🤯 #Stonks #BigBrainMove #CopeAndSeethe Share this chaos if you want the universe to know you’re in on the joke! 🪐💰🚀