🚨BREAKING NEWS: BIG BRAIN QUANTS BEAT THE STOCK MARKET WITH CHAD AI 💰🤖🚀 Y’all! Did you hear about Numerai? These finance wizards just pulled a major flex, raising a whopping $30M Series C (that’s a polite way of saying “money please” for the rich kids) 🤡💸. They’re over here trading stocks using AI-driven ideas from freelance finance quants! 🤓💻 Like, yeah, let’s just get a bunch of nerds who can barely socialize to figure out the stock market. No cap, it sounds like a John Wick sequel where AI is the main character 💀🔥. And who’s funding this madness? University endowments! That's right! The same folks who let your college pals waste their degrees on interpretative dance 😳. Paul Tudor Jones, the billion-dollar wizard himself, is apparently a fan of this money wizardry, proving that stonks are indeed not just for Tropicana lovers. Leaked developer quote: “We’re basically the Avengers of finance, but with more caffeine and fewer superhero powers.” 💀👀 Prediction: In 5 years, Numerai will either be a global trading powerhouse or we’ll be trading dreams on the Metaverse 💭💥. Either way, I’m betting my lunch money on these quants! #YOLO