🚨🕵️‍♂️ BREAKING NEWS: UBER UNDER FIRE! 🔥💔 So peep this, fam! New Jersey’s AG is diving deep into the wild world of Uber rides like it’s the latest Netflix true crime docuseries! 🚗💨 And let’s just say the plot twist ain't pretty! 🤡💀 Sources say they’re investigating if Uber’s safety claims are more fake than your NFT collection. 🤑✨ Like “Y’all thought drivers were verified? Nah fam, they’re just as real as your ex’s promises!” 🤣 Imagine the AG walking into Uber HQ like *Drake pointing at a slide that says “We 🚫 DON'T CARE about rider safety.”* Meanwhile, Uber is over here like “This is fine” while their safety ratings go up in flames like it’s the Fourth of July. 🎆💸 🚨 *Leaked Developer Quote:* “We didn’t think anyone would actually USE a ride-sharing app during a pandemic! 😱 Now we gotta deal with REAL problems, bruh!” - Anonymous Developer #Coping Honestly, this whole situation gives off major *Galaxy Brain* vibes—just when you think you’re safe, the universe reminds you it’s all a massive meme! 😳🚀 Here's my utterly unhinged prediction: by 2025, Uber will replace drivers with AI, and the AI will be programmed to avoid picking up anyone who gives off “bad vibes.” Get ready for the *Vibe Check Express*! 🔮💥 Y’all better buckle up and STONK the share button, because this ride is about to get wild! 🤖🤑✈️