🚨👟✨ Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the wild world of Nike's latest attempt to sell you overpriced foot pillows—introducing *neuroscience-based footwear*. That’s right, folks! It’s like if your shoes went to college and got a degree in “Mind Games”! 🤡💀 Let’s break this down: The *Mind 001* and *Mind 002* are basically your brain telling your feet to *stfu* while running. For a mere $95 and $145, respectively, you can activate what Nike calls your neurons 🙆‍♂️, because apparently, our feet need to take NOTES now! 📝💪 These shoes come equipped with 22 foam nodes that jiggle like an *overcaffeinated jelly* as you walk. Technically, they say it’s “like pistons and gimbals,” but no cap, it sounds like you're stepping on a box of overpriced Cheez-Its! 🧀🔥 Fun fact: Jay Paavonpera, Nike's spokesperson, said the white paper on this “technology” is coming soon. Uh, buddy, we might need that paper like yesterday! 😂 Meanwhile, the only thing we’re activating is our “give-it-a-try” skepticism! *Leaked developer quote*: "We tested it on 2,000 athletes but sorry brah, no data yet. Show me the stonks!" 💰💁‍♂️ 🔥🧠 Prediction: In 2025, we’ll see Nike release shoes with an app that teaches your feet how to do algebra. Welcome to the sneaker-verse! 🤖🚀💥 #MindBlown #NikeBrainiacs