🚀💻 Y’all, STOP what you’re doing, because we’re about to talk about the absolute SPEED DEMONS of the internet: The **2025 Speedtest Connectivity Report** just dropped, and no, it’s not just a TikTok dance challenge 🕺. This is the real deal! Apparently, some wild dude over at Ookla said, “We found a new ISP that’s faster than your ex’s excuses for ghosting you.” 👻💀 Who knew internet speeds could be the foundational element of your anti-social life? So, who’s taking the crown? 🏆 Drumroll, please... It’s not even your favorite mega-corporation! Sorry Comcast, your download speeds are still slower than a 56k modem navigating the unfathomable depths of the internet in 1999. Stonks? More like *sad trombone* 🎺🚫. Meanwhile, the internet is out here like: "This is fine." 🤡🔥 I can hear the battle cry from ISPs like, “We promise you our service will NOT be the reason you throw your router out the window this week!" 🚨🗣️ Leaked quote from a dev: “Yeah, we told our customers they’d get 1 Gbps, but it’s more like 1 *Giggle* per second. Cope and seethe, plebs!” And my unhinged prediction? By 2030, the top ISP will be powered by *actual cats* and *quantum computing*, charging you $1,000/month. 🤖🔥💰 Don't @ me! #GetWrecked #InternetSpeedWars