🚨✨ BREAKING: TIME TO MERGE AND PURGE YOUR BRAIN CELLS! 🌀💥 This just in: scientists found two black holes doing the horizontal tango! 💃🕺 That's right, they *merged* like two high school sweethearts on prom night (but way more chaotic)! 🔍💡 Physicists jammed their gravitational signals into a blender and hit "frappe" to decode their *surface areas* (like, who even knew black holes had a surface area? Are they just cosmic donuts now?) 🍩🕳️ Is it bad that I’m more interested in their combined dance moves than their gravitational waves? #BlackHoleBae In a totally REAL convo, a scientist just said, "Bro, we spliced that signal like a 90s DJ remix and it’s still somehow LESS toxic than Facebook’s algorithm." 🤡🔥 In other words, Hawking’s theorem is STILL making waves while we’re all just trying to survive in our own event horizons of debt and existential dread! 😩💸 🤔🚀 So here’s a hot take: in 5 years, black holes will be the next TikTok dance challenge. Prepare for "The Black Hole Shuffle." Imagine it: scientists in lab coats with gravity-defying moves! Stonks will be through the roof! 📈💰 Can we just get some cosmic explorers out there to TikTok this? I’m ready for the 2024 Black Hole Ball Drop Challenge! 💣💃💥 #CosmicChaos #GravitationStation