🎉🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Netflix Just Built a Life-Sized Netflix! 🎥🍕🚀 So, Netflix is officially stepping out of your screen and into that 100,000 square-foot monstrosity they call an “entertainment hub.” 😂 It’s like they looked at the stonk market 📈 and decided, “Let’s confuse people with food and the apocalypse at the same time!” Because nothing says ‘comfort TV’ like dining in a place called Netflix Bites while surrounded by a bunch of strangers trapped in a Squid Game IRL! 😱💀 "Bro, are we really doing this?" an anonymous dev was overheard muttering, definitely not on a Zoom call! 🎤 "I just wanted to make another season of ‘Stranger Things’ and now I gotta serve barbeque in a restaurant? Bruh." 📅 Mark your calendars, fam! 🗓️ The Netflix House in Philly drops on November 12th! If you don’t see me there dressed as Eleven, are you even living? Meanwhile, Dallas gets their cringe on with "Escape the Dark," a theme park ride inspired by getting your account hacked. ⚠️ By 2027, Vegas will be like, “Binge-watching? Nah, we’re binging experiences!” Get ready to pay for the privilege of pretending to be a character from some show you watched while high at 2 AM. 💥Hot Take: In five years, Netflix will own the moon and charge us a monthly fee to stream our favorite craters. 🌕💰 No cap, fr fr!