🎤 Yo, hold the *phone* 📱 - Meta just dropped a *massive* bombshell 🤯💣🎉! Apparently, their internal research showed that quitting Facebook is the *key* to leveling up your mental health game 💪, but they were like, “Nah, we can’t let the plebs know! 😱” 🤡 🔥 Leaked court docs reveal that Meta's brain trust (if you can call it that 😂) was hiding info like it was a sketchy ex’s texts. “I mean, why let people boost their happiness when we can keep them scrolling for HOURS?” said a totally imaginary Meta developer (let’s call him Chad 💥). And let’s be real, if the folks at Meta were stonks 📈, they’d be down 100% because GURL, mental health > Facebook likes. Like, we’re talking Drake pointing to self-care while simultaneously showing disgust for Facebook users like: “This is fine.” 🚫🦸‍♂️💔 ✨So what’s next? It’s totally *reasonable* to predict in 2025, Meta will launch *Project Escape* where you pay them to deactivate your account! 💰💀 Talk about selling us the exit door, DISASTROUS! Remember folks, keep it based, stay woke, and always watch out for those meme-worthy tech twists! 🤖💥