🏆🚀 Hold onto your pocket protectors, tech nerds, because Apple is back at it again with their *not-so-subtle* hints of dropping the M5 iPad Pro and Vision Pro 2 at an October event! 🍏 Prepare for the kind of hype that makes your grandma think she’s suddenly a TikTok influencer! 💁‍♀️📱 So, what do we know? 🤔 *A report* (probably leaked by a rogue intern named “Steve” 💀) says, “The new iPad is going to be faster than my love life!” 💔✨ Expect features so advanced they’ll make you question your life choices while scrolling through Twitter at 2 AM! No cap, if you’ve been dreaming of a screen so bright you can practically use it as a mirror 🎭, this is it. Meanwhile, the Vision Pro 2 is rumored to have “augmented reality” that’s going to make your cat realize it's a god. 🐱✨🌌 But let’s be real, Apple’s just milking their stonks like it’s a Reddit bull market. 💰🦙 “This is fine,” said everyone still waiting for USB-C on iPhones. 🔥 Unhinged prediction? By 2025, we’ll all be interfacing with our devices via *mind control*—or Apple’s new product: AirPods for cows. 🐄💫 Seethe about that!