🚨💥 **BREAKING CHAOS!** Lyft just decided to throw a *self-driving parade* 🚍💨💥 with their new self-driving shuttles in a partnership that has more red flags than a bullfighting arena! 🐂💀 Introducing “Lyft Lemmings” - the all-electric chonky boys powered by Benteler Mobility! 🤖⚡️ You ever see a bus shaped like a rectangle? Yeah, me neither, but here we are. This bad boy rolls with enough room for 15 people, which is just enough for a TikTok dance-off gone wrong or a rager of the introverted kind. 🕺💃 With a top speed of *37 MPH*, you might as well *walk* to your destination. 🚶‍♂️💨 Lyft claims their Level 4 autonomy can drive itself but *only if the stars align and the sun is shining*. 🌟🔮 So basically, it can drive in a tunnel during lunchtime on a Tuesday if the Wi-Fi signal is strong. 🤷‍♂️📶 💬 *"Honestly, we're just looking for any excuse not to hire drivers,"* said a *leaked source* at Lyft, aka “Mr. COO”. *“Self-driving? More like ‘please don’t open the door while I’m moving.’”* TL;DR: 2026 is gonna be another cringe year, but if you wanna risk your life with a taco in each hand, buckle up for the *most chaotic* shuttle experience! 🚀🔥 🔮 **Hot take:** By 2028, bus etiquette will be a new TikTok challenge, and *you'll* be voiding your warranty for a chance at eternal TikTok fame! #FreeYourShuttle! 🚍💰