🚨🎉 BREAKING: Lovense, the tech company that lets you pleasure yourself via Bluetooth, just dropped a *new feature*—WORST SECURITY EVER! 🔥💀💔 Who needs privacy when you can have leaked email addresses!? 🤡🤖 So, picture this: *some dude* researching internet security is just chillin’ when he stumbles upon Lovense’s *literally dangerous* vulnerability. After begging them for over a year to fix it, he finally goes full-on “expose you on Twitter” mode, because apparently their tech support got lost in a dark web dungeon! 🌑🛡️ Lovense be like: "We could fix the leaks, but have you tried turning it off and on again?" 😬💔 *Developer quote*: “We thought ‘Hey, if they can handle toys with Wi-Fi, they can ABSOLUTELY handle their accounts being hijacked, right?’” 😂🙈 Drake’s pointing away from your privacy and directly at that “Hacked by your ex” notification! 🙅‍♂️💔 Stonks are diving faster than my self-esteem on a Monday, but hey, who needs to secure their accounts when they have *Bluetooth-activated orgasms*? 🤷‍♂️💰 Prediction? By 2024, Lovense will launch a “Privacy Mode”—just a rubber duck you can yell your secrets to 🌊🦆. #ThisIsFine #Seethe #Based 🔥✨