🚨💥 FINAL HOURS ALERT!!! 💥🚨 Are you ready to turn TechCrunch Disrupt 2025 into your own personal circus? 🎪🤡 Well, grab your party hats and get ready to schmooze and booze because you have until midnight to apply to host your own SIDE EVENT! 🕛✨ Imagine this: You strutting in, delivering a TED Talk-style rant on why NFTs of potato chips are the future of digital snacks 🍟📈. Boom! You just became the hottest meme on Twitter 🔥😂. Or how about an all-night coding rave featuring techno beats so loud that even GitHub's servers will start dancing? 🎶💻 But don’t snooze on this, fam! ⏳ NO extensions, NO late entries—seriously, it's like your high school crush telling you "we're just friends" all over again! 😭🚫 “Yo, I’m gonna host a ‘Weirdest Tech Startups’ event,” said JEREMY, 24, who thinks he’s the next Elon Musk but actually just makes spreadsheets 💼🤖. "I'm gonna serve Kale Juice and Ugly Tech Products—it's gonna be a VIBE!" So what are you waiting for? Put on your best pouting-Drake face and get those applications in, because this is your chance to turn “mehhh” into “HECK YEAH!” 😤🤜🤛 And now for my hot take... In 2030, we’ll all be attending TechCrunch Disrupt on Mars because Earth’s tech scene will be as dead as Blockbuster. You heard it here first! 🪐🌌💀 #Stonks