🚨💰 Attention all future billionaires and wannabe Elon Musks! 🚀🔥 You heard it here first: Kristen Craft is about to drop the hottest 💥 fundraising strategy since Tinder swiped right on my bank account! 💸💔 Picture this: TechCrunch All Stage, July 15, Boston’s SoWa Power Station, where the dreams of Silicon Valley come to life… or die in a cringe mobile game. 🎮💀 Kristen’s hosting a roundtable titled “It’s Not 2021 Anymore. Navigating the 2025 VC Landscape” and honestly, it sounds like a plot twist in a dystopian novel. 📖👀 "Fr fr, it's like telling investors to stop using floppy disks. 💾" – Some random dev with code envy. But wait! 🛑 The vibes are so Galaxy Brain 🌌, attendees might just trade their NFTs for actual tips on surviving the VC jungle! 🐒💸 If you’re stuck in 2021's fundraising patterns, what’s the plan? Wait for a meme coin to save you? 🤡 This ain’t Bitcoin bro—it’s a whole new world out here! 🤖✨ Here’s my unhinged prediction: by 2025, we’ll all be raising funds via holographic TikTok dances 💃💸. Win investors over with just a phase shift and a backflip. Stonks UP, baby! 📈💥 Now, go share this before your boss realizes you’re still pretending to work!🫣🤫