🚨💥 BREAKING NEWS: Nintendo's dropped the ultimate *face-poking* simulator, and it's called Hello, Mario! 🎉📱✨ Yes, you heard it right! Forget saving the princess, kids are now thrust into the chaotic world of *Mario's FACE.* 😱👀 You can literally drag Mario's visage around like he's some kind of digital stress ball. Because why not? This is clearly what we all needed in 2023. 💀🔥 Developer leaked quote: “We realized our best game mechanics involve totally disregarding gameplay. So, here, poke his face until he loses the will to live! 😂” And don't get me started on the *My Mario* collection—because what's better than watching your toddler squish Mario’s face while slapping overpriced plush toys in your cart? Stonks, right? 💰📈 But let’s be real: this app is like *the cringe phase of Nintendo* we NEVER asked for. Like, are we sure that the adults aren't going to download it just to cope with their existential dread? 🤡🤔 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE ALERT: In 5 years, we’re all gonna be playing *Hello, Mario* in VR at therapy sessions! "This is fine" am I right? 🚀💔