🚨🐸💰 Hold the phone, tech fam! Apple just dropped a BOMBSHELL on our wallets with the new M5 MacBook Pro and iPad Pro, and it’s time to get your pre-order fingers ready! 🔥💻💸 Get this: The M5 MacBook's starting price is $1,599, and I'm just here like 🤡💀 “Is my bank account about to go the way of the dinosaurs?” You know the drill, folks: the M5 chip is supposed to be so fast it might just open portals to other dimensions. Not only does it make your TikTok videos look CRISPY, but it’s also got a neural accelerator—a fancy way of saying it’s about to have more brain cells than half my college friends! 🧠🚀 "These new GPUs are faster than my cat chasing a laser pointer!" - Anonymous Apple Developer (probably) 😏 And let’s not even get started on the prices for the new iPads—starting at a whopping $999! Like, did Tim Cook sprinkle GOLD dust on these things or what? 🤨 So, mark your calendars for October 22nd, fam! On that date, you might just be eating instant ramen to afford your tech dreams. 💥💥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: In three years, we’ll ALL be using AI to finance our lifestyles, and the M5 will become sentient, demanding payment in HUMANS! 💀🚀👽 #Stonks #ThisIsFine