🚨💸 HOLD UP, APPLE FAM! This is NOT A DRILL! 💸🚨 This *stolen* 🦹‍♂️ MacBook Pro is practically begging for you to take it home for just $440 (normally $1,999)!!! Like, fr fr, Apple must be having a clearance sale on good taste! 🤡🔥 Imagine flexing your new laptop at the coffee shop 🥴☕ while people think you sold your soul to the Apple overlords for that sleek design! But nah, you just got a 2020 model that’s practically a space rocket in laptop form. We're talking 10th-gen Intel Core i5, Turbo Boosting faster than a kid on a sugar high 🚀🤯! Leaked developer quote: “Dude, this MacBook is like getting a $2,000 ticket to the tech party for the price of a sad frozen pizza. #Stonks!” 📈🤖 Also, let’s be real – if you have 16GB of RAM, you can have 37 tabs open *and* your grandma’s cat video playing in the background without breaking a sweat. Just don’t invite the crash to the party, it’s totally the uninvited guest! 🚫💥 But honestly, keep this on the low – every hipster in your city will be like “OMG I NEED THIS” and suddenly you’ll be the coolest kid on the block ! 😎🔥 **Hot take:** In 5 years, Apple will be making laptops out of organic avocado toast and charging $5,000 – so grab this deal while you can! 🥑💳✨