🌸🤖🔥 BREAKING NEWS: Japan Just Sent Apple a "We’re Not Playing Your Games" Memo! 🚀💰 So, here's the tea, fam: Japan's Fair Trade Commission just rolled up on Apple and Google like: 🚨 "Y’all thought you could gatekeep the app store? Nah, fam, we’re opening the floodgates!" 🚨 💥💥 Yup, you heard it! 🍏 is being forced to allow third-party app stores and payment systems, meaning if you wanted to buy your exclusive “Cat Yoga” app from a shady dude named Gary in his mom’s basement, your dreams are coming true! inb4 “Cats can’t do yoga, bro” but you know it’s stonks 💸👉📉 Apple: “But we wanted to keep it *exclusive*! That's our whole brand!” Japan: “Yeah, and that’s cringe. Cope & seethe. 😒” Leaked Dev Quote: “I mean, who knew letting other people do their own thing would be good for business?!” 🙃 This is basically like Drake pointing at the *rigged system* and then doing the “I’m on board with this” dance as he watches users download apps without having to sell their souls first. This is fine. 😤🔥 💥 Hot take alert: Next, Apple will just send a "We're sorry" sticker in iMessage and call it a day! Watch this space! 🤡💀