🎉🔥🌪️ YO, Wake up fam! You thought Twitter was a dumpster fire? Wait until you meet JACK DORSEY’S NEW SIDE HUSTLE: Bitchat! 🐦💩 Lemme break it down for ya 💥— this app is the virtual equivalent of a potato 🥔. It’s like Jack was chillin' with his buddies, sipping on that "weekend warrior" coffee ☕, and was like, “Let’s build something that makes iMessage look like a lavish spa day!” 🙃 Bitchat Mesh (yes, that’s the name, no cap) is basically a Bluetooth gossip channel for your inner circle. You expect slick design? 😂 LOL, welcome to minimalism! 🤖 Think retro dial-up meets “This is Fine” meme-level aesthetics. 🥵 **Leaked Dorsey quotes**: "I wanted a place where you could send messages without all the corporate fluff... so I just gave up on design altogether!" And your contacts? Nah, they chilling in the void! Who needs friends? 💔 Just DM your existential crisis instead! 🤷‍♂️ **Drake meme**: Drake pointing at Telegram ➡️ "Let’s stabilize communications!" Drake pointing at Bitchat 🚫✋ "What is this cringe?!" 🔥🔥 HOT TAKE: Bitchat will be the app that *unleashes the chaos of human connections*! Or die in beta hell alongside Google+. Place your bets now, it's going to be LIT or FLOP! 💸🤡