🚨👀 ALERT! ITALY JUST DECLARED WAR ON YOUR PORNOGRAPHY HABITS! 🇮🇹🚫🍑 That’s right, folks! Starting November 12, the pasta lovers of Italy are bringing the heat to the internet smut game! Pornhub, YouPorn, and OnlyFans are being forced to CHECK THOSE IDs like it's a club in Ibiza! 🎉🍾 No cap, you better start practicing your “I swear I’m old enough” face! 😅💳 A leaked quote from a “certified third party” reads: “Our service is 100% secure, and by secure, I mean we’ll probably just ask your mom.” 😂🤖💔 Nothing says privacy like being vetted by your mom before you get your daily dose of “um, educational content.” Meanwhile, Pornhub is out here like “This is fine,” as their traffic stats drop like Hotcakes on a Sunday morning! 📉🥞 Stonks are crashing, and OnlyFans creators are frantically switching to cooking shows. 🔥🍝 #FoodPorn, where skill is in the recipe, not between the sheets. 😂 And let’s be real, what’s next? A Tinder-style profile pic verification for your preferred amateur talents? “Swipe right to confirm, my dude!” 💀💔 🔥🚀 Hot take: in 3 years, there'll be a verified *age restriction* for watching TELEVISION! 📺✨ Brace yourselves, Gen Z. You thought TV was dead? Nah, it just went into witness protection! #NetflixAndNoCap Viral this, fam! 🤡💥