🚨🍏💥BREAKING NEWS, Y’ALL! The iPhone Air has landed, and it’s thinner than my motivation to go to the gym! 🏋️‍♂️ #SWOLE📉 Tim Cook just dropped the “newest member of the iPhone family” like he was unveiling a baby giraffe or something. 🦒😱 THIS THING is so thin (5.6mm, babe) it could slip under your door and steal your lunch money! 💸💻 💅✨ And WHAT color options do we have? Space Black, Cloud White, Sky Blue, and Light Go... for when you want the existential crisis of owning another iPhone without the actual innovation. 🤡😩 #Stonks But let’s be real, no cap, how does this help us? Is it a phone or a Frisbee? 🤔🤷‍♂️ My Galaxy Brain says this will be Apple's latest attempt to distract us from their “iLawsuit” settlements. 💀💼 “Dude, we’re basically just unveiling a piece of paper,” one anonymous developer was "allegedly" heard saying. “But at least it still costs the same as my rent!” 🏡🔥 🔥🗣️ Prediction: In five years, we’ll all be using holographic iPhones that come with built-in neural interfaces, while Apple will STILL charge a subscription fee to update your iOS! Get ready for the iPhone Air 10X! ✨🥴💰 Total chaos incoming, folks. Stay tuned! 👀🚀