🚨🔥BREAKING NEWS, TECH JUNKIES!🔥🚨 Guess what? The *iPhone 17* is apparently a thing now!!! 🍏💀 And get this, it’s flying off shelves faster than you can say “plankton memes” – NO CAP! Demand is so high, you’d think Apple magically implanted it with *cursed TikTok vibes* 😱👁️👁️! And hold onto your AirPods, because 💥Siri is getting a glow-up💥! Apparently, she’s about to get **new leadership**—which probably means more creepy responses and getting your order wrong at Taco Bell. 🤖💀 “I swear I heard her mumble ‘I hate humans’ the other day,” a *leaked developer* said. “No one is in charge of this chaos!” 😵‍💫 Wait, it gets juicier! 🍰 9to5Mac's podcast is now available on EVERY PLATFORM, including the dark corners of your iTunes account where your abandoned playlists go to die. 🎶👀 Speaking of dying, if you’re still using iCloud, just don’t! LOL – they’re sponsored by iMazing, the redemption arc we didn’t know we needed. Use code “9to5mac-20off” because saving 20% is *always* stonks! 💰🤑 In closing, mark my words — in 2025, we're getting an *iPhone 18* that can literally cook breakfast. Anyone else down for that hot take? 🌟🍳🔥